This was too much to be simply a comment.

I took awhile to think about my response because I wanted to come up with the perfect answer. One that would solve all your problems - but that answer doesn't exist.

You seem to be talking about a lack of "will power". Even though you know it's wrong, and you know why you're doing it - you do it anyway. Some would say "you just need more will power." (As if you can buy it at a store!)

I say there's a better answer. An answer which will actually help you.

When it comes to this subject, I believe what Dr. Phil has to say about it 100% ... And here it is:

Dr. Phil's Ultimate Weight Solution
How It Works
"You no longer have to rely on willpower," writes Dr. Phil. "It simply doesn't work. Willpower is unreliable emotional fuel that drives you when you are excited, motivated, or energized. But you know as well as I do that no one stays fired up continuously. The seven keys to permanent weight loss do not depend on willpower for success."
Programming yourself for success is the key. "Programming involves making small, deliberate modifications in the way you live your life, and it has everything to do with developing a lifestyle that creates healthier behavior," he explains.
The seven steps to weight loss freedom:
1. Right Thinking: Get rid of self-defeating thought patterns, believe that you will succeed, and you will have mastered the first key necessary to overcoming your struggles with your weight.
2. Healing Feelings: Make choices that stop the cycle of emotional eating that has perpetuated your weight problem. Don't let stress, anxiety, or depression lead you to self-medicate with food. Change your emotional response to life's problems, and the unwanted eating behaviors that flow from it, and you can change. He instructs readers in how to identify the "payoff" you get from overeating and addressing those negative feelings -- getting emotional closure, so you stop self-defeating habits, says Dr. Phil.
3. A No-Fail Environment: You must program your environment in every possible way to avoid binge foods and reminders to eat.
4. Mastery Over Food and Impulse Eating: "Did you binge or overeat for one reason, such as a betrayal, a job loss, an illness, some personal tragedy, and you've kept on doing it as a matter of habit? Your pounds came on quickly, but the trouble is, they stayed because you are overeating habitually, whether you are hungry or not," writes Dr. Phil.
5. High-Response Cost, High-Yield Foods: This is Dr. Phil's way of saying, "eat high-fiber and other nutritious and filling foods - whole grains, lean protein, fresh fruits and vegetables, dried beans." It also implies eating foods that take time and effort to fix, require lots of chewing, and aren't fast food or other convenience foods.
6. Intentional Exercise: "Regular, intentional exercise is a big deal, a huge deal," writes Dr. Phil. "It unlocks the door to body control - a state of fitness in which your body is metabolically geared for losing weight and keeping it off, and is flowing with energy and vitality People who successfully manage their weight and stay fit exercise as a matter of habit."
7. Your Circle of Support: "Weight loss is not a do-it-yourself deal," he writes. "If you expect to lose weight and keep it off, you must build and nurture relationships that affirm and uplift you in life-changing ways. There is strength and power in support."
He also encourages getting a medical checkup if you're having trouble losing weight. You may have biochemistry, metabolism, or thyroid problems that require medical treatment before your body will shed pounds.
Reviewed by Cynthia Haines, MD, September 2005.
SOURCES: McGraw, P. The Ultimate Weight Solution: The 7 Keys to Weight Loss Freedom, Free Press, 2003. Cynthia Sass, MPH, MA, RD, spokeswoman, American Dietetic Association; co-author, Your Diet Is Driving Me Crazy.
WebMD does not endorse any specific product, service, or treatment.


© 2005 WebMD Inc. All rights reserved.

---So, there is no easy answer. Losing weight happens in a series of steps. I do recommend getting this book, even if just borrowing it from the library. It isn't going to be the solution to all your problems but it helps. You just have to take it step by step. You're going to have set backs. You're going to feel disappointed in yourself. You just have to try again. Don't give up.

Alternatly, you may be trying to tackle too much at once. There is a method called the Singular Success Method. Basically you pick one habit to work on at a time. When you feel comfortable, move to another one. For example, one habit I have changed is switching from white bread to whole grain. You could make that the first change you make until it becomes comfortable and natural. Then you could switch from regular soda to diet soda. Once that's comfortable, you could even change diet soda to flavored waters... When you go to work, take the stairs instead of the elevator. Park one row back than you usually park so you have to walk a little further. Maybe have an apple everyday. You can eat whatever you want, just make sure you eat an apple with it.... Do you see all the small changes you can make little by little? ...

This strategy works much better for me. If I go "cold turkey" and say, "Ok, from now on, no junk food and I'll exercise 5 times a week." --- Yeah right! I probably won't make it through even the first day. You have to know yourself and be practical. Yes, this is slower, but it's longer lasting. It does you no good to go "hard core" if you're going to make mistakes you feel guilty about, (which typically will cause you to go eat to comfort yourself.)

You need to take into account your personality. There is no "one size fits all" diet and fitness program. If you want to spend the money, you may want to invest in a membership at Ediets. They come up with a custom plan and I've heard people have had great success with it. (Though the Sparkle thing Perri told us about may be just as good. I can't say, not having tried Ediets.)

Some people swear by hypnotism. In a desperate attempt last year, I bought an expensive CD hypnotism system called "The Zen of Thin" fromthis site. I believe it works for some people - but I'm not one of them. I returned mine and got my money back. I'm just not serious enough. I found I couldn't keep a straight face while listening to them half the time - I'd end up cracking up laughing... Besides, you have to have a quiet place to listen to the CDs. Most mothers don't HAVE a quiet place!

Anyway - if you want to try it for free, go to that site and scroll down on the left sidebar for a sample. (I'm playing it right now as I type. Nick was playing GameCube here in the same room. He paused it and said, "Wow. That's making me sleepy. I need a nap." And now he's laying on the couch with his eyes closed. ROFL. Maybe this thing is worth buying again. Hee hee....)

Anyway, Aisha - YOU CAN DO THIS. We're all here trying, too.